Wednesday, 11 April 2012

Elisha's 100 Word Challenge Week 26

Dear diary,
One of the worst days of my life...
And it all began like this
It was the day Miss Harris revealed the final class project i would ever complete at primary school. We had to make a sculpture of something we loved. I was desprate to impress. I lay awake all night thinking about what I could do. Suddenly it came to me, my two favourite things were chocolate and my pet bunny called Coco. So the next day I sat by the side of my bunny and started to get to work.  after five hours, i had finally completed my work of art. I was so proud of myself, it looked amazing. I put in the fridge overnight to set. I was so excited about presenting my final peice of art work to the class. 'Ta da' I exclaimed lifting the lid off the box. "Oh no, the chocolate bunny has melted in the sun!"  I cried holding up a blob of chocolate!


  1. Great piece of work Elisha. Your first to be published I think? I really like the storyline to this. What a shame that the rabbit melted after all that hard work!
    If you were to improve this in any way, you could think about how to begin the sentences in a wider variety of ways.
    Well done and thank you for doing this in your holidays!
    Mrs P

  2. Hi Elisha
    We like your 100 wc! One way to improve is to use capital letters at the start of sentences! Me and megan don't get the bit were u say the chocolate rabbit melted in the sun because it was in the fridge!
    Good 100 wc! Sasha and meg!

  3. We love your story! I could feel the disappointment in your voice : o )

    Mrs.Goins & The Third Grade Rockstars at Mossman Elementary in Texas

  4. Lovely!!
    What a wonderful imagination you have to make this prompt into a diary extract.
    Just a small point to consider: make sure you always proof read your work out loud so you know it makes sense to the reader
    Well Done
    Mr Overton
    (100WC Team)

  5. well done i liked your 1000WC

    Diss, Norfolk, UK

  6. Prawnsandhummus20 April 2012 at 06:47

    Hi Elisha! This piece of work is quite similiar to Sasha's isn't it? However, I like how your 100wc is a diary entry. The only way it could be improved is by doing a tiny bit more sentence openers. I hope you have more 100wcs on the blog!

  7. Hi Elisha great 100wc. I really felt the despair in the story. The only way to improve it would be to add some conectives, and some more sentence openers.

    keep up the good work