Buisness was suffering for Graham. Only fifty four people visited his zoo on Saturday. "This is the only zoo in the country with a dragon in!" he cried, banging his head on the table. Miserably he looked on the internet for ideas. Then he had it! Scaly-beast Slush Puppies! Everyone loves these refreshing ice-cream drinks. He bought a machine. And trained his dragon to stir them. The dragon slowly stirred. Unfortunately the mythical creature dribbled in the mixing bowl....
The next day, Graham proudly re-opened the zoo. The slush-puppies were an instant hit. But when the visitors drank them, they all collapsed....and died....
Hi Jack
ReplyDeleteI loved your 100 word challenge and I thought how the dragon stirred the mixture. Suddenly whoever drank the slush puppies died, what a twist to the end.
From Ella
Wow Jack! That was amazing! I cant think of any more ways to improve it. i liked at the end how you used ellipsis twice near the end! good ending for a 100WC! 100/10!
ReplyDeleteJack N
Thanks for the amazing comments!
DeleteGreat 100 WC Jack. I think the humour comes across really well in your story. I don't think I will be eating any Scaly-beast slushies anytime soon. Great effort with your punctuation today.
ReplyDeleteKeep up this super work.
Mrs P
Hi Mrs Prior
DeleteThanks for the comment!
My idea for this came from the film 'The Zoo Keeper'
Hi Jack. This is a wonderfully imaginative piece of writing. I love the idea of Scaly-beast Slush Puppies and of the dragon being the one to make them.
ReplyDeleteI also thought your opening sentence was very mature - it's hard to believe that you are only Year 6.
Thank you for sharing this story. It's really brightened up my day.
Hello Jack. What an original use of the prompt. I loved reading your post. you have used a wide variety of sentence openers and your punctuation use it excellent. Well Done!
ReplyDeletea good 100 word chalange we like the way you say that its in a zoo
ReplyDeletejay and matty